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Dealing with your worries

This interesting article from the Worcester News from the U.K. discusses how prevalent the ill effects of worrying are. Although it is written from a uniquely British perspective, the main points transcend nationality. It's a quick read with some good suggestions for focusing on solutions rather then suffering your worries. If you find yourself worrying about your day to day life or have new challenging life situations that are keeping you up at night, call us for a free consultation. We can help.

Do your worries keep you up half the night?

By Sally Jones

EVERYONE, at some stage of their life, worries. It is part of human nature. However, have you ever stopped to think about how much time you spend worrying?

New research reveals that the average Briton is spending five years and two months of their life worrying. That's one hour and 46 minutes a day. Or 27 days a year.

The biggest worriers live in the North East, with twice the national average describing themselves as extremely worried'. You're least likely to worry if you live in Wales or the South West, according to the research by advice website ReallyWorried.com Here in the Midlands, the research claims that people worry most about losing their national identity and that their partner is cheating on them.

But Worcestershire folk said, although losing their national identity was a concern, it was not at the top of their worry list.

County residents revealed their top worries were about their family, their finances and their health.

"Most people worry about something every day, even without realising it," said 54-year-old customer services advisor Carolyn Wiggins, from Clifton upon Teme. "I worry more about work and finances really, but I don't let it take over my life."

Single mum Angela Dooler, 48, of The Lyppards, Worcester, added: "Health is a big worry for me. I worry about the way the health system in this country is going."

The research reveals that women spend an extra five weeks of their lives stressing compared to men. One in 20 women is extremely worried', but surprisingly teenagers are the biggest worriers, with one in 10 worrying for 12 hours a day.

Phillip Hodson, a fellow of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, says: "Although worrying has long been known as our national obsession, it's alarming to learn just how many people are chronic worriers, particularly as worrying is a central part of all anxiety disorders."

That's confirmed by statistics suggesting that 26 million people have fallen ill due to worry. All too often people fail to seek help with their problems, with 28 per cent of Britons bottling them up, and one in 50 driven to talk to their pets. Only one in 30 seeks professional help.

Mr Hodson advises: "Talking your worries through with someone - whether a friend, family or a professional - can be an enormous help and help people put things into perspective. People become over-anxious and dissatisfied as they desperately try to reach goals which for many are unattainable.

"It might be better to recognise that a lot of life can be boring, hard work and it's more fulfilling to enjoy the small pleasures of life."

YOUR SAY: WHAT IS BOTHERING YOU?

Angela Dooler, 48, a single mother from The Lyppards, Worcester, said: "I do worry about how we are losing our national identity, although it doesn't consume my days. I think we should have an English Day." Peter Davies, 62, a retired cheese importor from Bromsgrove, said: "Family is probably my biggest worry. You always want to make sure your family is OK. But I don't spend a great deal of my time worrying about things. There's no point." Carolyn Wiggins, 54, a customer services adviser from Clifton upon Teme, said: "I guess I do spend a lot of time worrying about things. Most days there is something to worry about, whether it's money or family matters." David Hubball, 17, a student from Peopleton, near Pershore, said: "I try not to worry about things too much and just let things happen. I suppose occasionally you worry about health or your family, but only if there is a reasonto."

HOW TO DEAL WITH YOUR WORRYING

Professor Michael Crawford, former programme director of counselling and psychotherapy at Leicester University, says: "Nip your worries in the bud. Try and deal with each worry head on - don't let them dominate every day, week and month."

His top tips are:

REVEAL your worries by talking to a trusted friend and discuss them, or use a website such as ReallyWorried.com. Don't be afraid to seek professional help if you feel unable to cope with your worries. WRITING down worries is extremely helpful. First, try and break them down into parts, ranking the worries in order of importance. Work out a solution for each task and when to complete it. Plan a reward for achieving goals.

LEARN to let go and relax to help stop worries dominating your thoughts. It helps if you can finish work earlier, allow yourself half an hour minimum time to unwind, and avoid watching TV programmes that leave you stressed.

DIET - cut down on caffeine and spicy food. Avoiding alcohol can help you feel better and more in control so you can tackle worry.

CHECK OUT YOUR OWN WORRY RISK

1. You're most likely to be a worrier if you're a teenager, aged from 16 to 19. They worry about getting on the property ladder more than saving the planet, school, or even sex.

2. Next biggest worriers are singletons, who are twice as likely to worry for up to 12 hours a day, compared with married couples. They're preoccupied about whether they'll have children.

3. Women outstrip men in worrying, and fret about the cost of living, ageing, and their partner cheating on them.

4. Men worry more about social issues like immigration and are twice as worried about sex as women.

5. Parents worry most whether their child is being bullied or taking drugs.

6. Retired Britons are the group least likely to spend time worrying - a quarter say they never worry at all.